June 7, 2011 1780 shop online at www.broadcasteronline.com Items Wanted 1815 Miscellaneous WANTED STANDING HARDWOOD TIMBER. Top prices paid for walnut veneer. Big sawlogs in North Iowa and Southern Minnesota. Hillside logging grove clearing. No town or yard trees. Email tdrumm2@gmail.com, 507-381-0277 (MCN) ATTEND COLLEGE ONLINE from Home. *Medical, *Business, *Paralegal, *Accounting, *Criminal Justice. Job placement assistance. Computer available. Financial Aid if qualified. Call 800-401-2385 w w w. C e n t u r a O n l i n e . c o m (MCN) Wanted: Broken concrete, have dump in South Yankton. Just South of Discovery Bridge. (605)661-1116. ATTEND COLLEGE ONLINE from Home. *Medical, *Business, *Paralegal, *Accounting, *Criminal Justice. Job placement assistance. Computer available. Financial Aid if qualified. Call 800-510-0784 www.CenturaOnline.com nani WANTED: Sealed Boxes of Unexpired Diabetic Test Strips. 1-866-446-3009; www.dtsbuyers.com (MCN) 1790 Lawn - Garden 12HP Ace Riding mower. New paint, fully serviced. $200.00. Call, (605)659-5354 1815 Miscellaneous **OLD GUITARS WANTED!** Fender, Gibson, Martin, Gretsch, Prairie State, Euphonon, Larson, D'Angelico, Stromberg, Rickenbacker, and Mosrite. Gibson Mandolins/ Banjos. 1930's thru 1970's TOP CASH PAID! 1-800-401-0440. nani *REDUCE YOUR CABLE BILL! * Get a 4-Room All-Digital Satellite system installed for FREE and programming starting $24.99/mo. FREE HD/DVR upgrade for new callers, SO CALL NOW. 1-800-795-8649 (MCN) ATTENTION SLEEP APNEA SUFFERERS with Medicare. Get FREE CPAP Replacement Supplies at NO COST, plus FREE home delivery! Best of all, prevent red skin sores and bacterial infection! Call 888-705-4795 (MCN) Available Now 2-4 Bedroom Homes Take Over Payments No Money Down No Credit Check Call Now 1-866-343-4134 nani DISH Network delivers more for less! Packages starting at $24.99/mo, Local channels included! FREE HD for life! Free BLOCKBUSTER® movies for 3 months. 1-877-805-7991 (MCN) 6x16 Tandem Axle Trailer, TNG 49SS Scooter, X-Box 360 250GB, 1980 Cutlass. Call Bob (605)760-4031 DISH Network's LOWEST ALL-DIGITAL PRICE! As low as $24.99/mo plus FREE HD FOR LIFE! Call for limited time BONUS! Call Now. 1-877-430-6211 (MCN) AIRLINES ARE HIRING Train for high paying Aviation Maintenance Career. FAA approved program. Financial aid if qualified - Housing available. CALL Aviation Institute of Maintenance (888)-686-1704. DONATE A CAR- Help Disabled Kids. Free Next Day Pick Up Receive 3 Free Vacation Certificates. Tax deductible Call Special Kids Funds 7 days/week. 1-866-448-3865. nani nani Call Classifieds 624-4429 Page 7 Home Country The Big Question — Why Water If It Makes You Mow Herb Collins was back out in the yard again Saturday. The noise made the neighbors go to the windows and peek out to see what was going on, because yard work and noise and Herb have never gone together. Mystery solved. Herb has a new gas-powered lawn mower. Last Saturday was the ?nal outing for his quiet electric lawn mower, as he once again ran over the cord and cut it. The cord ?nally had more patches than a quilting bee, and Herb had opted for a gas mower that didn’t require an umbilical link to the front porch. Steve was going by in his pickup truck, the big one with duallies and the blacksmith’s forge in the back, and he pulled over and stopped. Steve got out and watched quietly as Herb continued to mow the lawn. Steve poured himself a cup of coffee from his Thermos, pushed back his Stetson, and watched Herb work up a good sweat. Herb made three more rounds of the yard, and ?nally thought Steve might have something important to say to him, so he killed the engine on the mower, mopped his brow, and walked over to the visitor. “Workin’ hard there, I see,” said Steve. “Gotta stay ahead of it,” said Herb. “Why?” Herb looked puzzled at Steve’s question. “Well … otherwise it grows too fast and the yard looks crummy.” “I was by here Thursday,” said Steve. “Saw you watering.” Herb nodded. “Why?” “Well … to make the grass grow, of course.” Steve raised his eyebrows. “What?” asked Herb. “Isn’t it kinda like digging a hole and ?lling it up?” Slim Randles “I don’t get you.” Steve got back in the pickup, rolled down the window, and said. “Seems to me like you’re just encouraging it.” Then he drove away, leaving Herb to once again deal with the intricacies of cowboy philosophy. –––––––––––– Brought to you by Slim’s new book “A Cowboy’s Guide to Growing Up Right.” Learn more at http://www.nmsantos.com/Slim/Slim.html. www.broadcasteronline.com Top dress your corn! 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